Establish Clear Goals & Resolve Conflicts with EMDR Self-Coaching
Having a clear goal in mind is a sublime and motivating feeling. The vision of your own, improved future plays a decisive role. It is you yourself, who can reshape your environment to the desired state. The very idea of achieving that positive end state by means of your own personal action to change will make you proud.
A goal takes shape in our mind: In the mind’s eye, we see the timeframe in which we want to achieve it. We stake out subgoals and their degree of fulfillment. And we anticipate potential obstacles, which we have to sweep out of our way. And start to get down to work.
All this has an effect on our motivation and our well-being. Goals are important for our mental stability. Goals give us structure and meaning. We correspond successfully achieving them with happiness.
But woe to those who have no goals or often fail to fulfill them. Some no longer even set out for something new. For them, the very idea of a renewed defeat is too frustrating. Mental blocks slow them down and they come up with crafty strategies to allegedly protect themselves.
Then there are those who pursue countless goals until they have forgotten what they once considered really important to them.
However impossible goals protect us against being defeated, but they also do not make us happy.
The absence of ambivalence is required for a clear goal and its fulfillment. Ambivalence is the well-known feeling of uncertainty. At least two things or more seem just as important but even more decisive: None of them seem compatible with the other. People, who bear such a feeling, are rarely able to make a decision or attempt to take care of everything at once. This forces them to either do nothing or it drives them to activism.
Mentally this is perceived as a conflict. Both internally within oneself and with their mutually exclusive desires as well as externally with the environment and people surrounding them, who can do nothing but shake their heads at the hesitation or confusion.
No matter how intensely you may experience not having clear goals, everyone knows how good it feels to have your own unclouded clarity of purpose. Without doubts or conflicts we start on a path and take the first unwavering steps.
By means of the Rapid Eye Movement Stimulation – basic EMDR intervention – it is possible to soothe excessive feelings and reduce emotions of doubt. Even ambivalence can be given a new capacity to make decisions and important things can finally be recognized as such. All this creates room for new positive thoughts that stimulate our actions. It is in such moments that desires sprout particularly well. The old awakes as new and previously unthought thoughts are born.